Learning to breathe

I went to the chiropractor to get an adjustment the other day. While sitting in the waiting room I listened to the receptionist scheduling a photo shoot for her family. She mentioned how many would be in the shoot, including a foster baby that they had thought they were going to be able to adopt but turns out someone else will. When she hung up the phone I inquired about the foster baby. He is 5 months old and they have had him since he was born. They will have the opportunity to visit him but the receptionist was unsure if they would pursue visits for a time, not wanting to cause confusion for the baby.

I told her that I felt for her but didn't say anything else immediately. There were other people in the room and the timing didn't seem right. 

After my adjustment, as I took care of payment with the receptionist, I felt that I should share with her about our angel girl and I told her "so you can see, I really do feel for your loss. Our situations are different, but if it were me, after what I've been through... Visit that baby, regularly! He is a part of your life, and you are a part of his and you will always regret not starting the habit early or not seeing him enough."

With tears, she asked how I was holding up... I think I'm fine until someone genuinely asks... Then I realize again and remember what a wreck of emotions I carry, which I explained to her.

It was a short moment but something I felt quickly brought this woman and I very close. I wouldn't have had that advice for her if I had not gone through this.

I thought tonight about the woman at the well who met Jesus and gave him water.

I feel as though I sit on the edge of the deep hole has been dug in my life, I have toiled with sweat and tears to draw out water. This world cannot satisfy my thirst He has promised that it will be worth it. That what I give him will be returned with interest. And I will share my thirst for the day his promises are fulfilled because I hope others will be strengthened in their own passion, to cling to the savior.

J has lost a total of three teeth now and likes to remind me of this often by pointing out his gaps. 

Phillip has learned how to say "Let go!" and other phrases. We are working hard to use words instead of screaming in frustration.

Nate and I have been apart since July 27th. That's only two weeks too long and he still has one week left at his job in Provo. Mountain home is not the place I have dreamed of living, it's brown, dry, unpleasantly full of dusty wind... As another temporary home it will have to do...