The honeymoon was over.

We arrived at my parent's house. Sure enough, my mom had printed out a sign on my bedroom door that read "Welcome home Mr. and Mrs. Cassani"

Nate relaxes on the bed

As it turned out the very weekend Nate ans I were honeymooning, my parents had gotten a contract of sale on their town-home. The new buyers would not be taking possession for a month and my parents were packing off to California. We would be allowed to stay in the house while we found an apartment.
That first month before we found the apartment was one of the happiest and hardest. Nate and I were so happy to be together...
Most of the time....

 I get the vacuum

I had started wearing a birth control patch after the engagement back in November, so that when we finally did get married, I would not need to worry too much... 

I had been warned that the horomones might effect my mood...

I had become a monster. Seriously, I knew I was overreacting to everything but the knowledge didn't stop me from feeling out of control. 

Nate and I were both commuting north for work with the temp agency so all we had time for was traveling, apartment hunting, cooking, eating, sleeping... Finally one day I couldn't take it anymore. We had missed the bus to work. I decided we should call in sick and we needed a day just to find an apartment. The one month was quickly running out.

That day we found it. It was smaller than anything we looked at but it had laundry in the unit, it was close to the bus and the utilities were included in the rent. 

The Landlord said we could move in that day if we wanted.

Home Sweet Apartment

Pretent entry table/kitchen storage

Tiny Bedroom/livingroom

Tiny Dining

Tiny Kitchen

Improvised Shelving

Pretend Living room

Soon after I quit using the birth control patch a sense of normalcy settled in. Nate and I enjoyed our next 6 months of marriage in a basement apartment. Since either of us owned a car we rode our bikes all-around on city of Orem. It was exciting and sometimes tiring. Shopping with the most interesting experience. We liked to shop at Costco because you buy things in bulk. It was interesting trying to carry everything home on our bikes. Occasionally we would outdo ourselves and have to call neighbor or friend for a ride.

The bed all-a-mess and our dog (the stuffed animal)

Me watching a movie

We worked for express personnel in places like Meadow Gold, Peczuh Printing, Young Living. It was interesting because we worked with several people who thought that they could never work together with their spouse, it would drive them crazy, but Nate and I loved it. It gave us time to talk together and to know what was going on in each others day the time. Nate and I still laugh as we look back on some of the interesting people we worked with...
The comedian named José, who found out he really was a nerd as he talked with Nate about Power Rangers and Dungeons and Dragons.

The crazy woman who thought that Nate had thrown a box at her, and when she tried to throw a box back at him he happened to be bent over and didn't realize how upset she was with him.

The manager on my shift at Meadow Gold, who was wearing rubber boots but I still fooled him into thinking that his shoe was untied...

One of the advantages of being a temporary worker was meeting all of those interesting people and working in competitive environments where time is everything. I loved creating more fun by competing with coworkers to see who could load it fastest...

By this time in my life I still had not come to enjoy the Utah way of life. So many members of the wards seemed too busy with their own lives to really get close. With tensions between Nate's parents still high, we decided that it was time to move. I was mostly excited for Nate, I wanted him to have the experience of the family ward where the members were close and where he could have opportunities for callings that often don't exist in Utah.

I thought of all the places I never been to... One of places that I really loved to visit was Oregon. It was always so beautiful, the trees were green and the mountains were just gorgeous. We did our research, Nate and I even made a trip all the way out there and we located a great condo but as we returned to Utah and prayed, we felt it wasn't quite the right decision. My family living nearby in Oregon was currently in disarray they were going through divorce and I think that the Lord, at that time, didn't want us to get wrapped up in those things.

At this time my parents called. My mother knew that we had been searching for a home and that we were looking for any place outside of Utah. Their house that I thought they had sold in Florida, the buyers had defaulted on their payments and were looking at being evicted. My parents didn't think the buys would come up with the money and asked if Nate and I wanted to take over the place. It sounded like a great opportunity. I knew and loved the area and still had family there.

Not even having seen the place for many years, Nate and I prayed about it and felt that it was a good decision. We bought a car, packed up our things, and off we went.

Are we getting married?

I had told my roommates I would be getting married and moved out of the orem apartment by then end of January. I moved my things back to my parents house since Nate and I did not have an apartment arranged. We didn't have a wedding date set and getting a decision seemed forever away.

My parents were making plans to sell their house and move to California. I began to think that if Nate and I were not married I didn't want to be left in Utah without my family. I thought about going to California but felt sick about leaving Nate.

I prayed about what to do.

On Monday the 16th of January I drove to Nate's parent's house where he was staying. I took the Jade life savor necklace and the white gold engagement band. I knocked on the door and invited Nate to come outside. I explained that he was not going to be married to his mother for time and all eternity. And IF he was going to be my MAN, he needed to decide fast, because I wasn't willing to share anymore. I handed him the rings and said. "When you are ready to be my MAN, bring these back to me. I'll be waiting."

I got in my car to drive away. Nate waved me to stop. I rolled down my window.
"You'll be waiting?" He double checked.
"Yes." I said.

As I back out of the driveway I could see him standing there in the corner of my eye. I couldn't look directly at him. It took so much for me to drive away and leave him like that. I pulled around the block and parked the car. I cried my heart out, praying that I had done the right thing. When I could finally see again I drove home, but I still cried the whole way.

For the next few days I was determined. I would NOT call him. If I was missing him and needed a shoulder to wipe my tears on I'd call my mom. And if he called, I promised myself I would not get emotional, I would act fine and I would not take anything less that a full commitment from him.

Finally on Friday morning he called.
I had just gotten finished with my shower and sitting in my towel I starred at the phone... It was him... Deep breath...
"Hello" I said as cheerily as I could... Too cheerily.
He was thrown off... "Uh, hi. How are you?"
"I'm okay..." That was honest enough. I wasn't great, but I was going to live... "What's up?"
"Well, I'm calling to ask if you want to go to the courthouse today, or if you want to wait till monday, I'm not sure if they are open tomorrow... "
My heart was pounding right out of my chest "Are you serious? You really mean it?"
"Yes"
"Well, can you find out if they will be open tomorrow?" I was trying to think of having a little time to have people I wanted to be there....
"Hold on.........No, they are not open tomorrow."
"Well I'm not waiting till Monday for you to change your mind so I'll come today."
"Okay, so where should we meet?"
"At the courthouse." Thinking that would save time since it was about half way between the two of us.
"What time?"
"In an hour." I would need to get dressed, get my parents and drive half an hour.
"Is it okay if I bring my mom?" I didn't have the heart to make her miss the wedding of her first son to get married...
"Yes, she can come."
"Okay, see you soon."

OH MY GOSH, was this REALLY happening?
I yanked open the bathroom door and starting yelling for my dad. "Dad, I need you to put on a shirt and tie and be my witness at the courthouse!"
"WHAT?" Mutter, Mutter. "I'm on the phone, hang on a minute" He hollered from downstairs.
I went to my bedroom... I was getting married! I had not finished my dress.  I had planned on a two piece gown but I hadn't even started the skirt. The blouse was peiced together but I hadn't sewn any of the hems. I grabbed some safety pins, put on the blouse and put on a lovely purple prom skirt.
I grabbed the bouquet I had made and then an outfit for my mom to wear in the pictures. She would not want to be in her work cloths.
My dad came running up stairs "What's going on?"
"Nate and I are getting married at the courthouse today. I need you to put on a shirt and tie and be my witness."
My daddy smiled at me and said "We're going to pick up your mother, right? She'd kill me if I didn't make sure she was there."
"Yes, I planned to pick her up on the way, I have these clothes for her"
"Oh, good."

We got in the car a headed to walmart to get my mom. My dad called her phone so she could let her manager know there was a family emergency and she needed to leave work early. Mom got in the car and I gave her the outfit I had pulled from the closet. She asked if there were socks and shoes... I hadn't thought of that. We had to stop at another walmart along the way to pick those up...

I called Nate to let him know we were running behind. Nate said "That's okay," his dad was driving down from his job in salt lake and would take a while too. His mom wanted to know if we wanted to have the bishop marry us in the relief society room of their ward meeting house after we got the license from the courthouse.
"That sounds great."

As my dad pulled out of the second walmart he had some how thought that we were going to a different courthouse than the one I had in mind. I told him where he needed to turn, the lane beside us was empty but the car in front of us did not move when the light turned green... He honked, they moved, and in all the excitement, dad gunned it to enter the other lane just as a car pulled up beside us... I saw it all as if in slow motion and started shaking my head... I had the camera, got out of the car in my fancy dress and started taking picture of the accident.
The other driver saw our attire and got out of his car. "I can tell you must be in a hurry. I'll just need your name and phone number. It's a rental and I paid the insurance, so you really don't need to worry about anything.
All that had been damaged on our car was the headlight cover so off we went...

We finally got to the courthouse and processed our application and received the license.

After that we went to Nate's house to wait for the Bishop and Nate's dad. While we were waiting Nate's mom insisted that he at lease take a shower. Nate consented and left me and my parents waiting...

Finally we all went to the chapel. The cameras were brought out but I felt really tense. I was scared that after all this, as we went before the bishop there was still a chance for Nate to change his mind... I wasn't going to smile or be happy until it was a done deal!

The Bishop made sure this was what we both wanted and we proceeded.

Instead of saying "I do" We both said "Yes."

We signed the license and became man and wife.

Pictures were taken, we all planned to go out to lunch but first Nate and I needed to talk. Everyone left us at the church to wait at the restaurant.











Nate and I sat in the foyer and caught up on the last three days of separation. Nate explained how as the time went by and he felt what his life would be like without me, he realized that wasn't the kind of life he wanted. I explained how it hurt to leave him but my life seemed to be giving me one of two options: Stay or leave.

We held each other close and just breathed, knowing that as we joined the family again there would barely be room for any breathing. We went to lunch at the China Lily to celebrate.



Pictures, smiles and fortune cookies taken care of we were surprised yet again as Nate's parent gifted us a honeymoon stay at the Inn On the Hill in Salt Lake and lent us their car for the weekend. I notified my temporary employment that I would not be coming to work that day and off we went.
















The honeymoon was perfect. We stayed in the Zion Room. Nate and I were so sore, felt like we had been bruised from head to toe. It may not be like this for every newly wed couple but it seemed like all the stress leading up to this event had sapped us of everything we had. Three days in the hotel was exactly what we needed. Just a few blocks from Temple Square we spent most of Saturday and Sunday enjoying the history and events.

The view from our room

Cushy robes

Getting ready to go out.

We've finally arrived.

Enjoying temple square

When the three days were over we got in the car and started driving south. We were about 30 minutes out of Salt Lake when I asked Nate where we were going... We'd never arranged an apartment...

Laughing about not knowing where we were going 

There's only a little bit of "I told you so" in this look...

There was NO WAY we were staying with his parents... I called up my dad and asked if my room was still available. He said my mom would probably be upset if we didn't come there, because she had taken the time to make up the room just for us.